Lostmum1971
I am a single mum of a 16 year old daughter. It’s pretty much always just been the 2 of us. I split from her father when she was a few months old. Domestic violence. Over the years, my daughter has become increasingly independent. She’s just started college locally. She was a netball player for 3 or 4 years and has decided to give that up, and doesn’t even participate at the sports college she attends. I’m just writing this as short as possible, I’ve missed bits, but I’m sure you get a feel for my life. She’s always been quite caring, drawing me pictures, writing me notes etc etc, but during the last 3 years, and more so in the last year, she has become someone I don’t know. At all. I cry nearly every day, she’s so rude to me. She never speaks, unless she wants something, she’s short, abusive in her language, she spends any time at home, in her room, on her phone speaking to friends. She eats in there, and the mess, we’ll it disgusts me. She has no respect, for me or her surroundings. She’s an intelligent person, she goes out with friends, she does drink occasionally, and a number of times, so much that I’ve been up with her whilst she’s being sick. I run around after her, and her friends, but get no thanks. She’s bleeding me dry of money, any extra I earn she puts a claim to, and please don’t say why do you do it? If you were me, you’d see that I have no one to turn to for support. I keep myself busy most evenings, I still participate a lot in my sports. This is the only thing keeping me going at the moment. I guess what imo trying to say, is, is this normal? How do people get through this, extremely upsetting time. I hate it. I feel sad that we are wasting precious time together, and by the time she realises, it will be too late. This is so, in a nutshell. There’s so much more I could say 😢
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familylives
Hi, I understand that this is a difficult and upsetting situation. Being scared of your daughter and crying every night is not normal. If your daughter had a sudden change in personality and behaviour, then this could be a cause for concern and perhaps you should discuss her behaviour with your GP or you could contact Young Minds, they're an organisation that helps families in similar situations to you, you can call them on 0808 802 5544. If you do not feel that you are able to handle your daughter you could contact Social Services, they're not just there to remove children from families, they're there to support families and create healthy environments for everyone, you can read more about them here. You may find it helpful to read our articles on teenage behaviour. If you feel you need further support please e-mail us at askus@familylives.org.uk or call our freephone helpline on 0808 800 2222.
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