Tee
I’ve been married to my husband for 25 yrs. we have 4 kids between us. My 3 daughters live near/with us but stepson who’s 35 lives away. We have a problem where as he’s met a lady with 5 kids 2 of which are still young and live with her. She’s been married 3 times. He’s marrying this lady next year after 18 months tog. My hubby and myself have a villa in Spain. My children go sometimes with us but stepson not been as often. No prob with him going...but he’s now demanding a key to keep so he can just go when he can(were his words) my hubby agreed at first but I disagreed as I’m not comfortable with him suddenly wanting keys to keep.  We have never met this woman he’s with or her children. He uses excuse he’s too busy or can’t afford to travel the 5 hour journey to visit us. I’m finding it hard and it all doesn’t settle well with me. It’s caused arguments with me n my hubby as I understand he’s his son but surely my concerns are natural? My stepson has only visited us 3 times in almost 6 years? Suddenly wants keys to our second home? I’m feeling used. Am I being unreasonable?
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familylives
Hi Tee

Thank you for your post. I can understand your frustrations and why you are feeling concerned about your stepson having the keys to your villa in Spain. I can see that something is telling your instincts that it doesn't feel right and your husband perhaps is feeling a bit torn as he is his son. I wonder if you can talk to your husband about no-one having the key except you both and that when if or when your stepson does want to visit the place in Spain, then he just clears it with you guys first just in case someone else is using the place first. This way you and your husband still maintain control of your second home without compromising your relationship with the family. I hope that this makes sense. 

Moderator
Family Lives 
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Tee
Thank you for your advice
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