aQuietRumination

Okay, so probably ever since I turned 18 3 or 4 months ago, it feels like everyday when I wake up in my house is just jokes upon jokes from the people I love (my mum, my dad, and my sister) about how im lazy, im unhelpful, im inconsiderate, and im going to fail in my future. I've told them politely several times to stop making these jokes because they hurt me inside and I've done everything they've asked me to start pulling my weight on regularly since they asked me to start doing it, even though after I told them this they made me out to be the bad guy again saying it was 'only a bit of fun'. Everything they say im lazy on is things that I offer to do but they say they'll do for me, so I let them. Most days I barely even speak to them because it just results in ridicule, so I stay quiet and let them list off their jokes.
Today was the last straw, they all called together for a 'family meeting' in the kitchen, and instead of all expressing their satisfaction with the house, they all just stood me there and listed off more jokes about what im not good at even though they know I dont like them.
After the jokes kept coming at me in the family meeting, I corrected them and said 'now hang on, I am trying my best to do that and youve seen me doing it' and they say 'yes but sometimes you forget and you're not ready to be an adult like you should be because of that' and we go around in circles listing things that I am doing but sometimes (not all the time) need reminding to do. Eventually, I get frustrated because they're not getting the point after all this time that im upset that every day when I get out of bed I know theyre gonna make a joke about something on me or about me and it makes me very insecure. My dad starts getting mad along with my mum saying they'd never make those jokes to me, even though they have and they know they have because ive brought this up many times before, and because my dad was starting to call me more names like a child and immature and he was cutting me off whenever I tried to respond after his sentences were done, I called him a prick for saying his own son was these things when I do nothing everyday but be polite to them despite it all.
Now, a bit of context, my sister has been outwardly kind to me for a long time, but inside I could always tell she wanted to piss me off more than anyone else. She'd always find sneaky, unnoticable ways to cut me down at any chance. For example, she'll do jobs for me as a 'favour' then complain when others are around that I 'get her' to do it, and everyone believes her because they all have their little pool of jokes to throw at me even though ive said that it makes me hurt and uncomfortable.
Anyway, after all this, my sister jumps in even though she had left the room before this and was in no place to pass judgement, she leans in from the doorway and calls me horrible things like selfish and worthless and mean, and because I can tell my parents agree with her, they did nothing to stop her calling me these things and just told me to go away like I was in the wrong for getting annoyed at all these names.
At this point, im crying and I leave to be alone in my room, and I go to sleep until now when im writing this.
I dont know what to do next, I feel like the worst person in the world but I believe in what I said, I believe that the jokes they make are harmful and that they're doing it despite my initially polite wishes.

In summary, I have been called names targeted at my insecurities and inabilities for months, and when I act on their comments to be better by, for example, washing up dishes more often, they just come up with new harmful words. After telling them many times to stop, I explode today and get angry when they stand me in front of them and spend the whole discussion jabbing at me without letting me get a word in edgeways. I feel like the lowest form of low and I know unless I apologize and sacrifice what I believe in then none of my family is going to talk to me again. What do I do?

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familylives
Hi, I understand that this is a difficult and troubling situation. In situations like this, it's best to remove yourself from the people that are hurting you or at least minimise your contact with them. If you help around the house and are doing the things they say you aren't then it may be best to try to get out of there as soon as you can. Is there someone you can stay with for a while? Perhaps you could also looking to counselling, you can do that through your GP, explain to your doctor how you're feeling that you'd like to start counselling if that's something you'd be interested in pursuing. If you feel distressed and need someone to talk to, you can always call the Samaritans freephone helpline on 116 123. You may also find it helpful to read our articles on bullying. If you feel you need further support please e-mail us at askus@familylives.org.uk or call us on our freephone helpline on 0808 800 2222. 
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