Logic
Hi everyone I have a complex issues that I need to get out and hopefully get some advice on. As you read by the tittle I hate my dad, he's the root of most of my problems and is why I'm now so isolated and away from my other side of my family. I was 4 when my mum gave me up because of my dad she hated him and I went to live with my gran in another country for a bit before going to my dads. He was cruel and would often beat me and get mad when I cried about my mum, over the years he would under mind me by saying my other side of the family (on my mums side) never loved me and I was going to end up on the streets like my deadbeat cousins  and he'll walk past me, he would say all sorts to me. He often told me he couldn't stand me and belittle me and make me feel like dirt. Any problem I had he would never listen always thought he knew best and would blame me and side with them and nothing has changed he's still the same person. I've always had mental problems too and when I used to get in trouble in school when I was 7 and he ask me why I done it I tell him it's the voices and he would deny they exist and lash out. I don't even fit in with my dads side of the family either they are always making me feel like I'm the weird one and say I ain't a (my dad's second name) and it's meant to be a joke. They know how I feel about my mum and my other side of my family who I remember being very kind and warm people and also very loving until my dad came in like a wrecking ball. But they have the nerve to tell me to get over it and stop crying over spilt milk they are all selfish narcissistic people and I hate all of them. Now I'm alone with no friends and with major issues my dad and his family bought on, he keeps messaging me asking to meet up but I've been making excuses and ignoring his messages I just don't know what to do as I want him out of my life for good all of my dad's side. He's allowed his friends to join in in the little game and would play mind games like telling me my mum is coming and they would all laugh when it was reviled it was only a joke and something about my mums inheritance but that's not clear right now more and more is coming back though and I'm beginning to lose sleep. In case your wondering why they did that they hated my mum and I would defend her which made them hate me. Honestly I'm trying not to swear as I type this but i am so sick of them all and they all walk around like everything is fine. It has made me stronger but I'm isolated and my dad is surrounded by good friends and a wife it's not jealously just pure hate and I don't know what to do about, I'm not a hateful person  just towards my dad and his family what to do?  
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familylives
Hi, I understand that this is a difficult and troubling situation. There's nothing wrong with disliking your father or not wanting anything to do with him, especially considering the things that you've described above. It may be helpful to consider what you'd tell someone else in your situation. If you want to completely cut ties with this side of your family, you could block his number, you don't owe him an explanation. Perhaps counselling would be helpful? You can get a referral through your GP or you can refer yourself through the NHS website here. If you feel you need further support please e-mail us at askus@familylives.org.uk or call our freephone helpline on 0808 800 2222.
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