KL
Hi,  I'm new here, looking for some advice please.  

Last night after dinner we started playing monopoly as a family (we have a 7 year old daughter too), it all went pear shaped after 40 minutes playing because he wasn't getting the properties he wanted,  the board went flying and he stormed off.   We just let him go off and back on his xbox because we didn't want another horrendous argument.   We have a planner in place which says he has to come off the xbox at 9 PM, shower and chill until bed at 10 PM.   9 PM arrived and we said it was time for his shower, it all kicked off, we just ignored him because we didn't want it to escalate,  we were trying to watch a programme that he normally watches with us but he was trying to annoy us by shining a laser pen at us and the TV, after 40 minutes my husband just got up and started ironing for the next day, our son then got a glass of water and poured it over the sofa, I wiped it up and he repeated this 2 more times.   At this point hubby shouted and told him to get to bed.  He went up and woke our daughter up by twisting her leg,  she ended up crying and wide awake, we got ready for bed and he kept coming in switching on the light and pulling our quilt off, when he eventually went into his own room he started turning our Alexa on, which we unplugged,  so then he did it to our daughters,  we unplugged that one so he then put some really loud music on the one down stairs.  I was crying and my daughter was crying by this stage and our daughter was in our bed scared and tired,   my husband went into him and got his phone off him so that triggered him even more.   All this went on until 12.30.  It was emotionally draining for us all.   There is nothing we can do when he's like this until he decides he wants to calm down and say sorry at which point we end up cuddling him and saying it's ok.   

Is this normal teenage behaviour? These episodes happen every couple of weeks and always last at least 3 hours,  they are exhausting.   We try ignore him and keep calm but he just keeps niggling at us until one of us flips and starts shouting . 

Do I need to see a doctor or is this normal teenage behaviour? 

Sorry for the long post and advice appreciated.
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familylives
Hi, I understand that this is a difficult and upsetting situation. Have you considered that it might be the ignoring that allows these situations to last for hours? Perhaps confronting him head on with a no tolerance attitude might be more helpful. Setting boundaries and showing that you won't allow them to be crossed is part of building respect. Personally, as someone who hasn't met your son and doesn't know him, this sounds like usual teenage behaviour if a little on the more extreme side. However, you know your son best and if you believe that this is worth speaking to your GP about then that decision is up to you. Have you asked him, when he's calmed down and in a better mood, why these situations happen? Communicating with your children is very important. You may also find it helpful to read our articles on teenage behaviour. If you feel you need further support please e-mail us at askus@familylives.org.uk or call our freephone helpline on 0808 800 2222.
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